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Hey there busy Boomer . . GenX'er: What would you think of giving your aging parents a gift that costs you absolutely nothing except a little more of your time? Would that fit your budget? More importantly, would it fit your lifestyle? What is it, you ask. Are you sure you're ready? It's a commitment on your part - signed, sealed, and delivered . . . not just some flimsily-wrapped agreement - to slow down with, around, and for your aging parents. Slow Down! Sure, your busy midlife existence runs at high speed and overdrive every minute you're not sleeping - and you probably give that sleeping part far less time than it deserves. This season, though, try giving yourself AND your aging parents the gift of your slowing down - even slightly. Consider it an exercise in seeing how much you've been missing. Don't jump at this too quickly. I mean, you wouldn't want to overdo. Just think for a moment, though: - When was the last time you told your elderly mother or father to take as long as they needed because you'd be happy to wait . . . and then you WERE happy to wait? - What, from among all your many commitments and over-commitments, could you cut back in order to free up extra time on a regular basis for the two people whose time is far more limited than even yours (over the long stretch)? - How much would you lose (versus how much could you gain) if you dropped just one outside involvement in order to get more involved with your aging parents? (Remember, Spending your time with them fidgeting and looking at your watch as if something more pressing were waiting doesn't count!) - What kind of response do you imagine you'd get from your elderly parents if you said there was no rush, that you had all the time in the world - for them . . . and then took off your coat and settled in for whatever it was they had in mind? - How would your aging parents respond if you showed up out of the blue to take them for a long, slow drive to someplace - or to see someone - you never seem to have time to visit? The astonishment factor would probably be enough to create something cataclysmic! And, wouldn't that be great?! Do you see where I'm going here? Shifting gear matters - to both of you! Life moves far too quickly without our speeding it up unnecessarily. And, believe it or not, it's going even faster for your aging parents. I know, you think they're slowing down . . and they are . . on the outside. But by their internal clocks, time is rushing by. They can't control it. They can just try to keep up. At this point in your life, you're just the opposite. Your internal clock is still keeping a slower, more steady beat. On the outside, though, the demands on your time keep you zipping at ever increasing speeds. The challenge for you, if you choose to accept it, my midlife friend, is to consciously shift gears and slow down enough to match your parents' external pace - even every so often. This gift to them would be incredible! Do you have it in you? I'm betting you do. And just think: In the long run, the rewards far out-weigh the costs. What more could an adult child of aging parents ask the perfect gift to do? I'll let you decide.
Article Source: http://www.articles-unlimited.com
An expert on "letting go in aging," Gail McConnon helps midlife adults clear out the emotional baggage that interferes in their relationships with their aging parents. Gail is a professional aging coach & mentor & holds BA, MPH, and MS degrees. Gail also was the adult child of & primary caregiver to her mother for the last six years of her mother's life. Visit www.celebrateagingparents.com for info, resources, free reports & Gail's blog.
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